More Tiny Things

 I wouldn't say I've been bitten by the creative bug, but I've made a couple more tiny plant holders. They are whales, and they are for air plants. I got the inspiration on pinterest and made one from clay, and one from apoxie sculpt. The air plant will look like the water spout out the top of their little heads. 

Once I made them I was crushed with some imposter syndrome and told my sister I felt more like a xerox machine than an "artist." She gently reminded me that I still created my whales with my own two hands. It's still my style, my creativity imprinted on the thing that *I* made. Inspiration comes in all different shapes and ways, and it's okay to be proud of my little creatures, even if the idea isn't 100% unique or original - my interpretation of the idea is. 

I had an emotional PT session this past week too. At the end of the session she asked how I was feeling with our progress, and I admitted I was nervous about my progress appointment next week with the surgeon. She asked why I was nervous and I burst into tears. Ugly cry, hiccups, the whole 9 yards. I told her I was afraid of him saying my efforts aren't enough. That, like before, I won't be believed that I am working hard, doing my exercises, and really giving it my all. That my best still isn't good enough. She told me that I need to take ownership of that appointment. To not give him any room to criticize my efforts. That I should tell him that I'm getting stronger everyday, my kneecap is really starting to move, and I'm already to 40 degrees of flexion. She told me that if I present myself as recognizing my accomplishments, rather than diminishing them, that he will be excited about my progress too. She then had me practice saying outloud all my progress. 

I told her she earned the "therapist" portion of her title that day, and she said it was simply part of her job. I like her a lot, and she's very patient with my neurotic guarding and lack of self esteem during my treatments.