Therapy Round 2 this past Monday. The session itself was pretty mild, the conversations after were a bit more indepth.
Then the 24 hours lag it takes hubby to process set in and it's been a whirl-wind since, to say the least. He's panicing, scrambling, smothering me... He doesn't understand that by doing that he is pushing me further away.
And I've been hurting. My whole body just hurts... and I'm not sure how to tell him I can't take anymore. I am having a really hard time hurting as much on the inside as I do on the outside. It's getting to be overwhelming. I can't make the physical stop or go away... I'm stuck with that for now. But I just want a break from the emotional hurt and pain too. I just want a little time away for myself to just breathe a little, regroup, find my footing again...
But even if I ask for it, I won't get it. I'll have to demand it, take it regardless of hurt feelings and tears, and power through.
This sucks.
And now he's acting like everything is fine. Hiding in plain sight...
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